Wedding Officiate Essential Tools - A Pocketknife

By Dr. Kelly Carr

Carrying a pocketknife to a wedding ceremony might seem like an unusual practice for a wedding officiate, but it could come in very handy, even if you do not live in Arizona. It has come in handy for me on more than one occasion.

It was just a couple of months ago that I was performing a wedding for a young couple. It was a second marriage for both of them. The bride's young son, about 4 years old, was the ring bearer. As happens quite often, the ring bearer carried a pillow with the wedding rings tied on top. He marched in just right, took his proper place and waited patiently for his cue.

When the time came in the wedding ceremony for the ring vows and the exchange of rings, I said to the groom as I always do, "What token do you have to give to your bride as a symbol of your love and affection and a seal of your marriage?" He answered, "A ring." The proud young Ring Bearer stepped forward perfectly and held up his pillow with pride. What happened next was agony.

Normally, the rings are tied onto the pillow in such a way that the bride or the groom can simply pull the ribbon and the knot is untied and the ring is loose and can be easily removed. However, sometimes when the ring bearer is very young, the person who ties the ring onto the pillow is fearful that the young child will accidentally untie the knot and the ring will be lost, so they tie the ring securely. (This is a good reason to use ornamental or fake rings on the pillow and let the best man carry the actual rings.)

This must have been the case on that day. The person who tied the rings on the pillow on this day must have been afraid the little fellow would lose the rings or possibly, they did not know how to tie the appropriate knot. When the groom reached down to loose the ring from the pillow, and pulled the ribbon, the ring did not come loose. The knot tightened instead. I think you can imagine the slight panic and embarrassment as he now tried to untie the ring. However, since he had pulled the ribbon, as he should have, the knot tightened instead of loosening making it more difficult to untie. The groom, had a nervous laugh. I think he began to sweat. People began to see what was happening and also joined in the laughter at his predicament. He tried unsuccessfully to untie the knot for a few seconds which seemed more like a few minutes to him and his anxious bride. The innocent ring bearer was also getting worried.

Even though I could not see everything because the groom's body was between where I was standing and the actual pillow, I knew from experience what was. As the wedding officiant, I try to never get flustered and help everyone up front to keep calm and accomplish their roles without being embarrassed. I reached into my left pocket and pulled out my little Swiss Army pocket knife. It has a small blade, a file, a small screw driver, a toothpick, tweezers, and scissors and is only a little over an inch long. I opened the scissors, and handed it to the groom. He was so focused on untying the knot that he did not even see it, but the bride did and took it from me and handed it to her groom.

He seemed very happy and relieved to see it. He cut the ribbon and proceeded with the ring exchange. Obviously, we had to use the scissors for the groom's ring, too, a couple of minutes later. She was prepared to receive it this time. It was just a part of the ceremony.

I have carried a pocket knife like this for years. So did my Dad. He encouraged me to carry one also to be prepared. It is just a $10 item and fits so easily in your pocket. I have used it just like this in more than one ceremony. I have used it before the ceremony to do any number of helpful things for people. Women seldom carry a pocket knife, especially if they are wearing a dress. Wedding Planners, moms, bridesmaids, even grooms are often very happy to see someone with this useful tool. I would encourage you to get your own Swiss Army Knife and make it a habit to carry it with you at all times, unless you are boarding an airplane.

So, the next time you are performing a wedding, remember to take your pocketknife. You might just be the hero the couple talks about for years to come.

Dr. Kelly Carr is a pastor, wedding minister, and entrepreneur and lives in scenic Chandler, Arizona with his wife and three children. He has performed weddings and renewals for more than 450 couples. He has prepared a number of very helpful resources such as The Wedding Income Toolkit for Ministers, The Wedding Vow Kit, The Wedding Rehearsal Genie, A Guidebook for Searchers, Revelation: Book of Mystery and Majesty. The Wedding Income Toolkit is designed to teach pastors, youth pastors, music ministers, associate pastors, chaplains, and ministers of all kinds how to increase their income significantly by performing weddings. It includes text, templates, wedding vows, special readings, wedding rehearsal instructions, audio, and personal support. This reproducible system can help ministers use the training and credentials they already possess to help them meet their financial goals for themselves, their families, and their ministries.

If you live in Arizona and need a wedding officiate, please consider him and stop by and see his helpful site below. www.ArizonaWeddingSPastor.com

Degrees:
D. Min. Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary
Th. M. Dallas Theological Seminary
B. S. Liberty University

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